Another Note to Coffee Drinkers.

If you order a black coffee, I am going to write it down on the sleeve as a black coffee. Whoever makes it, whether myself or someone else, is going to make a black coffee. DO NOT order a black coffee if you intend to put milk in it. A black coffee with milk in it is not a black coffee, but you are an idiot. Its even worse if you order a black coffee and then ask me to pour some out so you can put milk in it. Some people have the decency to drink a little so they won't have to pour any out. However, if you make the mistake when ordering of saying "black coffee," you should deal with YOUR mistake and not make it my problem that you know nothing about the coffee you drink.

incessant mind ramblings.

Ok so I've had my wedding gown picked out since I was about 13, and my honeymoon location picked out about a month ago. Granted, there's no groom yet so those things are subject to change. But this WILL NOT change: the bridal prep room, no matter where it is (hotel, my bedroom, a random room in a church basement) WILL NOT have a clock, a pair of scissors, or anything alcoholic. It WILL have one bridesmaid with a watch, rope, and the authority (maybe jujitsu knowhow) to kick my butt. This will not happen to me.

In other news, I've had a lot of time at work where there's really nothing to be done. I have overheard a quote, come up with one of my own, and found something.

Overheard quote: "That's so big its big!"

My own: "I'm procrastinating like there's no tomorrow." Think about it. If I put off 'till tomorrow what could be done today, and I'm doing it like there's no tomorrow, I'm basically deciding not to do it. Clever huh? Ok way too much time on my hands.

Found something: I broke open a roll of dimes into the register, and lo and behold, its not $5.00 worth of dimes in there. Its $4.91. How does this happen you ask? One "dime" was a penny. Pennies are bigger than dimes, how could it have fit into the roll? you ask. Well, I'll tell you. This penny has been worn smooth to the point where Lincoln has become Lincoln's ghost. The edges are worn enough that it has the same approximate circumference as a dime, and about the same thickness too. I kept it, because my imagination began to run when I saw it. I wonder where that penny has been. No one knows the date it was made, maybe its a really old one, or maybe it is from last year. If its from last year, how did it manage to achieve its present condition in so short a time? It reminds me of a story I had to write in 8th grade about the journey of a penny. Actually maybe it was more like 5th. It wasn't a good story. I think my penny fell in the ocean and got eaten by a fish. And that was the end.

Ok that's all.

EDIT: Why would a fish eat a penny?

Just hafta...

MSN has an article about the 9 strangest attempts at tax deduction.

#9 is my favorite:

This one was so outlandish that Dittrick actually faxed us the two-page itemized receipt to prove it: "We live in an Amish community here, and we had an Amish guy who tried to take a deduction for his buggy with velvet interior, the whole works. It was tricked out. He was legitimately Amish, but with all the accoutrements on this buggy, when they're supposed to live the simple life, it was absolutely hilarious," she says.

How pimped out was his ride? According to the receipt, this baby came equipped with dash lights, kick plates, tinted windshield, speedometer, hydraulic brakes and dimmer switches. The standard buggy costs $2,675; this pimped-out version ran $3,545.

"He could deduct the buggy, of course, since it was used for business, but on that one, we had to pick and choose what we were going to deduct," Dittrick says. "But the Amish teenagers do go through a period where they sow their wild oats, so to speak, and put the fuzzy dice and boomboxes in them. Every so often in the police blotters up here you'll see a complaint about a buggy with music playing."

A wonderful night.

I don't really talk about my dating life that much, but this one just can't be hidden.

Imagine getting dressed up (not super dressy, but still makeup; that's more than usual) and putting on new earrings bought specifically for tonight and going to Panera Bread (not high class, but excellent food). Following Panera, we drive to quaint and upperclass Princeton (yeah I know Rutgers Rivals ok whatever) where we park outside a cathedral-converted-to-theater (McCarter Theatre). Inside we pick up tickets and he refuses to tell me where our seats are. Its a surprise. Once allowed into the theater, we waltz down to the very front row center and debate who wants seat 103 and who wants 104.

The lights dim, the announcer tells us to turn off the cell phones and unwrap our candy now, and then suddenly we are ushered into a new adaptation of Alice's Adventures in Wonderland, performed by former circus performers... so you can just imagine how lively and... aerobic... the show got.

Finally, Alice returned to her chess game in her living room and the audience began to gather their things. But wait, the night is not over. Follow the White Rabbit's trail down the block a little to the Mad Hatter's Teaparty, where the two special drinks are the Mad Hatter Teatini and the Cheshire Smile (or some such name like that). While enjoying the live music and mingling with the guests, and later the actors, feel free to sample the catered hors d'oveurs:

~Certified Organic and Grass Fed Beef Tartar, Rosemary Crostino, Dijon Mustard, White Truffle (yes I am a lacto-ovo-pesco-pollo vegetarian *grin* but yes I ate raw beef to say I did it *grin wink*)
~Coriander Encrusted Aji Tuna, Pickled Jalapeno, Cucumber (spicy and sour)
~Oysters on the Half Shell, Champagne Mignonette (smelled good)
~Vanilla Scented Pulled Pork, Chive Crème Fraiche, Micro Greens (somehow, we missed this one)
~Lollipop Lamb Chops, Mint Chimichurri (had to pass it up to make up for the tartar)
~Moroccan Crab Cakes, Lemon Saffron Aioli (to die for)
~Cabrales Stuffed Dates with Jamon Serrano (in English, dates stuffed with cabrales cheese and wrapped in prosciutto from Parma)
~Olive Oil Braised Artichokes, Roasted Garlic, Pecorino (didn't see this one either)
~Roasted Butternut Squash and Fresh Sage Petit Quiche (like the crab cakes, orgasmic)
~Black Cecci Bean Bruschetta , Red Onion Confit, Olive Oil Whipped Ricotta (wow)

After three gintinis or Cheshire whozits between the three of him (he himself and him) I got to wrestle over the keys and force myself into the driver's seat. Overall... it was an excellent evening. And I now have a pretty oyster shell for my trinket collection and the mentality of a 7-year-old. All that, and since its in a college town, its relatively affordable. Granted... its PRINCETON... but still. They need things cheap there so they can save to pay off tuition loans.

If ever this show comes to your area, go and see it, and pamper yourself somehow before or after, even if that just means putting on makeup. It will make the experience so incredible.

More gifts from abroad

Tea tree oil soap from Australia, and Irish yarn!

And a $20 bill on the floor of Menlo Park Mall. Yayyyy. I know, its not abroad, but I can pretend. I mean, half the people there don't speak English anyway.

And Anissa just walked in with a necklace from Ireland too. Awesome!

Gifts from abroad....

So since everyone I know left the country and left little old me in New Brunswick, they have begun to bring me gifts from the places they went. Not counting the pre-Christmas Jamaican, Thai, and Hong Kong-ese gifts, James is the first- he brought me a black pearl from France. Its actually one of those bath balls, but it is supposed to turn your bathwater black and shimmery. Here is what it says:

Perle Noire- Boule de bain petillante. Tel un pirate, jetez perle noir dans votre baignoire et partez a l'abordage de votre canard dans une eau de myrre et d'encens.

Here is how freetranslation.com chose to put it into English for me:

Appear Black- bath Ball petillante. Such a pirate, throw appears black in your bathtub and leave has the collision of your duck in a water of myrre and of acclaims.

Aaaaand altavista.com (babel fish):

Perle Noire- Swell of bath petillante. A such pirate, throw pearl black in your bath-tub and leave has the boarding of your duck in a water of myrre and incense.

James is pretty sure that at the center of the pearl is a rubber ducky. That must have been one big oyster if a duck is the equivalent of a grain of sand.

I will keep you all updated on the gifts. Rumor has it (from the gift-bearer herself) that there is something awaiting me from Ireland. I hope that I will not have to translate anything from Gaelic. I don't think the web translators have that option.

Happy New Year!!

Saturday night I went to see Brittany and celebrate her 21st with her. Happy Birthday Brit!

Then for New Year's Eve, my parents came to visit and Steve and I went out with them to Luca's which is a really nice Italian restaurant. It was byob, but there was a liquor store next door, so we went to get a bottle of Chianti, which was cool because I've never had Chianti before, even when I was in Florence.

Then we went back to Steve's place cause he has a nice TV and we watched Cars because I thought my parents would love it and I am pretty sure they did (I fell asleep for a little bit). Then we watched the ball drop and brought in the new year (yay).

Then we went outside to leave and went back in to call the police because someone threw a bottle of Corona through the back windshield. But the police were really busy so my parents decided to just forget and go home (they were going to spend the night). On the way to my place to get their stuff the whole windshield caved in so at least that way my dad could see out the back window.

Isn't it nice to end the year with a bang? I think so. I think I'm going to smash something every year now. Only it will BELONG to me (*cough-JERK-cough*).

Anyway, 2006 wasn't so bad. Lots of changes, but not bad. 2005 was better, because I don't like change. But I grew more this year. Well both years. But more this year I think. As long as its not 2003, we're good. Here's hoping 2007 is not another 2003.

Yep that made sense. K Gnight everyone! Happy New Year!