California is full of Dinosaurs.

So, Mom's cousin Nancy turned 70, and Grandma turned 80. So, all the ladies of my family who were able to flocked to California to celebrate. We had about 10 days of girl talk, birthday parties, tourism, and "a few good laughs."

Here we are at the rental place. Question: How do you fit 6 women and their luggage into a 2009 mustang? Answer: Only in your dreams. We ended up with a van.
L-R: Me, Mom, Aunt Charnell, her daughter Molly, Grandma, Aunt Jill


After loading all our stuff up we followed the Garmin to our first destination, chosen for us by our hosts, Mom's cousin Dawnne, Nancy the birthday girl, and Nancy's daughter Dianne. We followed that Garmin along a pretty steep and winding path that we later discovered was one of the most dangerous roads in Southern California. Finding ourselves on the desert floor in Palm Springs was a relief, and felt like entering a different world. I imagine in the summer its kind of like Mordor: hot, rocky, and surrounded on all sides by mountains.

Friday night we checked into our hotels (some of us were staying in a hotel that was more on the luxury side of life because, well, a couple of them happen to be insanely rich). After we settled into our hotel, we headed over to the resort hotel where we planned to have a birthday party involving 12 of the ladies of the family. The mexican food was delicious and abundant.

Despite reminding me of Mordor crossed with some pretty darn expensive hotels, the entire Palm Desert area put on a wonderful display of mountains, palms, and clouds.
Saturday, Dec 5. While Aunt Charnell went to urgent care to get treated for a sinus infection, a few of us went to a street fair, which is what the rich folks call a flea market.


Saturday morning, at Aunt Charnell's insistance (despite her sinus infection) we drove to a tram station for a ride to the top of the highest mountain. On the way, we passed a wind farm. I once saw an episode of Mike Rowe's Dirty Jobs in which he cleans the grease (yes, carbon-footprint-grease) out of the inside of these things. I don't think they are the "clean energy" everyone thinks they are. But they are definitely photogenic.


Me at the top of Mount San Jacinto (pronounced, "huh-SIN-toe"), elevation 8516. It was 30 degrees and windy and snowy up there. Incidentally, NJ was having the same weather. I could have stayed home and watched the Discovery Channel.
If you look closely, you can see that the tram passed through the cloud cover and out the other side in order to get us to the top of the mountain.


Sunday evening we had dinner at a gorgeous and expensive house owned by mom's cousin's daughter and son-in-law. Despite being in their home, it was a really dressed-up affair, complete with plates that go under your dinner plates. I didn't find out until Friday that these are called chargers. I honestly don't see the sense in using a charger unless it is made of wicker and goes under your paper plate so your hot dog and potato salad don't spill all over the lawn.

Monday morning it was raining buckets, and all of California was happy since it hadn't rained since June 15th. We were ok with the rain, but the temperatures were incredibly cold. We went on a trolley tour of San Diego, which included some interesting stories about the history of San Diego and how it was founded. Most of my pictures came out with water droplets, since I took them through the windows of the trolley.

After the trolley ride we returned to our host home- Dawnne's house- to get dolled up for a Ladies' Tea. We had been told to bring one good outfit to wear to the tea but when I pulled out the dress I'd brought I realized I'd die of hypothermia if I wore it. Luckily, most of us are close in size and we all had a giant clothing swap, since we were all feeling cold from the rainy weather.

The tea was interesting. Several women from the church volunteered to be "hostesses" which means they decorate the table and the caterers (children and men from the church?) come first to the hostesses to be sure each teapot is correct and nothing is wrong with the teacakes and finger foods. Each table is decorated differently, but each table should have been featured in some home or living magazines. It was a nice experience, and now that I have done it once, I never will again.


Tuesday morning we got up and headed to Los Angeles. Notable experiences were: the snow capped San Bernardino mountains in the distance, my Aunt Jill posing with Samuel L. Jackson and Molly kissing Justin Timberlake at Madame Tussaud's, all the footprints in the cement, the Hollywood sign, Rodeo Drive, and having your picture taken with actors playing famous characters.
Me with Charlie Chaplin.


Very quickly, the time came when we had to pile into the car and head over to the filming studios, where my grandmother's surprise waited: A filming of Jepardy. My grandmother actually argued with Alex Trebek about the weather in California, and I got no pictures because the security in Hollywood is heavier than at the airport. Note for your calendar: watch Jepardy March 1 and 2, because you might be able to see the audience and we were in the front row, in front of the contestants' family members.

After Jepardy, we drove down Sunset Boulevard and found a relatively inexpensive place to eat that claimed to be the favorite of some celebrities or other. You can tell how much I care about rubbing elbows with the rich folks. A favorite quote of the evening was, "We picked a place with a mechanical bull so that we would fit right in."

A table with seven women attracted some attention, and somehow we were blessed with a ginormous martini glass full of cotton candy (on the house). While the cotton candy was fun, the glass was also a good photo op.


A guitarist and a violinist came over to serenade us (Runnin' down the road tryin' to loosen my load I've got seven women on my mind... hey, there are seven of you, oh sorry, I missed that chord, ok wait we'll start over). They played a LOT of songs for us and I think they kept coming back to us because we sang along at the top of our lungs, while the other dinner patrons just sat and listened politely.

And yes, I did mention a mechanical bull. We took pictures first, and then Molly, Aunt Jill, and I all rode it. The only thing missing was the "Hick and proud of it" t-shirt. And line dancing. That place should have had line dancing.


Wednesday morning we got up way too early and went to tour San Diego's harbor on a tour boat. Things we saw: birds, sea lions, dolphins, battleships, the Star of India, the HMS Surprise, Tijuana, a coast guard cutter, more battleships, submarine sailors above deck returning from a tour of duty, helicopters, the hosptial ship Mercy, and a small vessel that nearly caused two accidents. Ask me about the Pterodactyl and Dinosaur Eggs story.
Mom got to turn the ship's wheel.


After the tour we drove to Cabrillo National Monument, the second most visited monument in the US (after the Statue of Liberty). We were blessed with a unique photo op by the little guy at the top of the cross, below.


Still not done with the tourism that day, we stopped in Del Mar to see the sunset and have a $4 Mai Tai.


And pole dance with the heat lamps. That was BEFORE the drinks came.


After that we headed to Nancy's for a home-cooked meal, which we appreciated and then, as if we didn't do enough tourism for the day, they dragged us out to the race track to see the Christmas light display.
Dinosaurs for Navin.


Thursday morning we were supposed to sleep in. Dawnne came into our room at about 8 am, saying, "The weather is gorgeous even though it was supposed to rain. Lets go for a hike!" I now know why coffee shops started on the West Coast.
Me, with the mountain behind me. I climbed to the peak and back in 3 hours. Iron Mountain, elevation really-dang-high.


Thursday after the hike no one was available to give us a tour of anything, due to previous engagements. So we had the afternoon to ourselves. We spent most of it lost, had another trip to urgent care for someone else's sinus infection, and ended up at Balboa Park, where I took a bazillion pictures, but liked the irony of this one:
A photograph of a photographer.


Friday, despite more rain, we bundled up (four longsleeve shirts for me, including two hoodies) and headed to the San Diego zoo, where for some reason every time I tried to take a picture of a big cat, it squatted for bathroom reasons. There were some pretty neat exhibits about the animals that once roamed North America, including statues of them so we could see how big they would have been.
I give the San Diego Zoo some big-time props for their optimism.


Friday evening was another birthday dinner, cooked by Ray, Dawnne's husband. It was fancy like the rest of them, except everyone knew we had come from the Aquarium- I mean the Zoo- so it was ok that we were not dressed up and were soaking wet and chilled to the bone. Somewhere during the week I overheard the comment, "I'm about sick of dressing to impress the rich people." Which was entirely true. At a certain point I decided my internal body temperature required a big heavy water polo hoody regardless of the presence of chargers and if you don't like it, leave. But I have to admit, I think I liked Ray's cooking the best of our meals out there (but don't tell him; he'll get a big head!)

On Saturday it rained again. We drove 2.5 hours to Santa Monica to meet mom's cousin Rick (the Saxton side) and mom's cousin MaryLee (the Wilson side). We then sat in a restaurant for 4.5 hours while I learned more about my family's history than is good for me. Then we drove 2.5 hours back to the San Diego area.
We passed a dinosaur on the way to the restaurant.


After getting back to San Diego, a few of us had the urge to find a place to go line dancing. I guess 9.5 hours of sitting down can do that to you. Unfortunately, all we found was a tiny smoky bar with loud music I didn't like. But when you are having a 10-day-long girls'-night-out, you can find fun anywhere. While some of us made fun of the dancers ("that guy dances like an orangutan, that one dances like an epileptic gay man, white people sooo cannot dance, and wow I feel like I'm still at the zoo") a few of us sipped a beer, I used mental jujitsu to get rid of a guy with a bad pick up line, and grandma flirted with the young men. When she let one of them lead her to the dance floor, we all scrambled for cameras, but it was too dark for me to get any good shots.

On Sunday, we were awoken once again for a tourist destination even though it was the day of our flights back home. First we went to a really awesome botanical garden where the dinosaur in me felt right at home in the prehistoric-looking palms and ferns. Then we were off to Del Mar for a walk on the beach. And here are some seals on the beach in La Jolla (pronounced "hoya"):


And the skyline of La Jolla. There is a reason it is hoity-toity. Look at that view. No, not me, look at the cliffs behind me.


Our plane landed in NJ at 4:45 AM Monday morning, and I slept from 6 till 2 pm. I came back to 62 new emails. My life will continue to be crazy until after Christmas.