A Game of "What If"

What if you were a farmer?

You would probably have something like this:

You would want to turn him into something like this:

So, to fatten him up, you feed him some of this:

Those are grains, in case you didn't know.  Grains form the foundation of an American's diet, because someone gave us this:

And then, after learning in school that grains are the most important part of our diet, we look like porkers and someone has the audacity to put in the newspapers things like this:

Why on earth is obesity a surprise?  And WHO is the farmer that's trying to fatten us up for the slaughter?  Make no bones about it, one of these days, we're going to wake up and realize we're just being farmed by aliens.