Sunday

So. I went to church today, the one that meets in the LSC. Due to LTC's "Once upon a Mattress," the service was conducted in a castle. Which was interesting. By the way, for those of you who didn't go see Mattress, you missed out on an awesome show. It wasn't perfect, but its always fun to see people you know doing stuff that they probably do a lot anyway haha (Mickey, Chris, etc...). Anyway, I definitely felt that I got more than my $5 worth out of the show, so... yeah. That was a tangent.

Back to the church service... I told God I'm sick of how the atmosphere around Rutgers sometimes makes me feel like everyone is throwing mud at me. And then the sermon, which was .5 seconds after I made my complaint, was from Micah, who essentially said, "Woe is me, life is hard." And then continued it with, "But as for me, I will wait in hope because God makes life worth living." And THEN God said, "You're not being very much like Micah." And then I felt as if all the mud was gone, and... That's just what happened today I guess. I feel like I'm having a power struggle with God, like where is my trust, really? I give it to Him, I take it back, I give it to Him. Why can't I just let Him have it? Life would be so much easier if I could remember that God is in control of things. I've been getting a little better lately, but still... I worry more than is healthy I think.

And after church, I went to lunch with Anissa, which was nice. The way things worked out, we were sort of pushed together in jujitsu, and I love being able to have someone else who understands the way I think about God and life and stuff. Well, I have other people who do that too; I'm not intending to neglect my other friendships by mentioning this... but whatever. What I wanted to say was I had fun eating lunch with Anissa.

And now of course, I'm ignoring my studying for two tests tomorrow. And I'm going to keep ignoring it by going to jujitsu tonight. Its ok, I have all night haha! Actually, I kind of feel pretty prepared for them, so I just need to look stuff over. Okay... I guess I'll do that now then...