I'm a muffin

SOOPER CHOCOLATE

You are a chocolate chocolate chip truffle muffin with a ribbon of nauseatingly rich fudge baked in caramel! With frosting and sprinkles! Oooh, sprinkes. A cherry on top as well! A candle and sparkler! What does this mean? You are probably filled with happy energy and have the power to make everyone around you scream with unnatural euphoria for hours on end. This is not a good thing. You have an 87% chance of dying due to autoerotic asphyxiation.

Riiiiighttt... Time for me to go to bed. I have better things to do.