yep...

Couldn't get through the day without yet another mishap. I have a large potted hibiscus that is about three feet tall (my pride and joy because it loves to flower for me), which a cat body flying through the air knocked over, creating a domino effect, breaking its base and knocking over my purple galaxy hibiscus and potentially killing it, which then knocked over my streptocarpus. I was waiting patiently for the purple galaxy to bloom since the blossoms are so gorgeous, but it was finicky and didn't bloom, and now I don't think it will survive this shock. I am not quite sure I know why a cat body was flying through the air, but I saw it out of the corner of my eye and was too far on the other side of the room to do anything. I can't handle another day of this. If my parents don't come home tomorrow, I am going to lose it. Then we'll SEE the cat bodies flying through the air.

Clumsy Betty

My parents are away on their second honeymoon (looking at property down south to buy for retirement), and I am discovering the joys of being a full-time housekeeper without actually having the benefit of owning what I'm caring for.

In the past week I have tripped, dropped, spilled, ruined, or destroyed more things than I care to remember. The cats are constantly underfoot because apparently playing with your siblings is not enough. It is cat code that you MUST play with your human, and if you are in a household with more than one cat, you MUST NOT share your human with the other cats. If it is wet or slimy it has ended up on the floor, the steps, or the carpet. If a cat can puke it up, it has been puked up. If it can die from not being watered then it did. If it runs on electricity then dad needs to look at it when he gets home. I can't even keep my nail polish nice long enough for it to dry.

As if that's not enough of a rant, here's the real thing:

My computer sounds like a meat grinder, my parents' computer has a trojan that keeps getting detected by the virus scanner, but for some reason refuses to be deleted, and the dishwasher smells like burning plastic and sizzles when water drips off the dishes. Somebody puked on the rug in the living room, and two rugs in the basement, and it wasn't me. More than once, I dropped the cat food and had to start over, including the premium cat food on the front steps so now our porch smells like tuna. One of our plants is sitting in a vase of water rooting, so we can eventually pot it. One day I looked at it and discovered it was bubbling like carbonated water and getting all frothy on top. I don't know what the heck that was all about but now the water is molding. The weather has not been right for our maple tree so every time I go out there to check the sap buckets, they are empty, which means I don't have any maple syrup yet. What little sap I did get yesterday, I accidentally dumped down the sink today. I think that actually was the last straw, and oh crap I forgot to scrub the ring off the bathtub, because the bath ball James got me from France left its purple mark. Apparently the French have sexy maids to clean their tubs, otherwise they would never invent bath balls. I have about 6 apples that are rotting on the counter because I didn't get the chance to throw them in the blender for my lunch. Why am I eating lunch from a blender? Because I gave up solid foods for lent (during the day, at night I can eat vegetarian solids). I have too much produce that is rotting in the fridge and the fruit basket because I've been too busy feeding 5 cats and a guinea pig and cleaning up after myself to actually eat/drink anything. And when I wasn't busy? I went out and bought 4 shirts, a shawl, and um undergarments... which were on sale but which I will probably return next week when I decide I actually would prefer having money. On the other hand, in the off-chance that some of my job applications might ACTUALLY lead to an interview, the shirts would be helpful... or if I were that type of girl, maybe the undergarments would come in handy... but I digress... it frustrates me that I don't have a job, but if I did have a job, I think the house would burn down while my parents are down south.

Ok thats all.

mmmm

You do not know true bliss until you eat pumpernickel bread with deli mustard.

booo hoooo

I am so disappointed that the avocados went bad.

post

I have just typed up a short little thing but can't post it for a few days cause someone might read it. but it makes me go arghhh.

arghhhh

EDIT: Ok, now I can publish this post.

I can't go two seconds without screwing up at least one nail-polished nail. Why is that??

Why I love The Onion

For those of you who don't know, The Onion is the most reputable news network available. Check out this video.

Also from The Onion, a list of Election-related words you may need to know before voting:

Corruption: The most effective and efficient way to produce results in government.

Debate: A contest to see which candidate can answer the fewest questions.

Electoral college: A process by which the number of states in the Union is narrowed down to the most important seven or eight.

Voter apathy: The reason most American politicians are able to achieve and maintain office.

Random Thought

I would have voted for Steven Colbert. He has more charisma than all the other candidates combined, and he doesn't have one foot in the casket.

Casket. That reminds me.

I drove past the cemetery on the way home from church today. There was a truck LEAVING with a casket in the back. Not a hearse, but a flatbed-style tow truck. Now why would a casket be LEAVING the cemetery? All the people in there have the same problem, which is death... Did someone get cured from that?

Rant of the day

So... I saw a Valentines Day commercial involving rings... and I started thinking about every engagement ring ad that I have ever seen. I started realizing that every engagement ring ad contains rings with protruding jewels (usually diamonds) on them. Basically what happens next, is that the diamond spins to the other side of the hand, scratches the neighboring fingers, and snags clothing, usually only the expensive clothing. Are engagement rings supposed to be that annoying? Do they HAVE to have a diamond? When someone gives an engagement ring with a protruding diamond, aren't they really saying "With this instrument of torture, I promise to be a thorn in your side for the rest of your life?" Is it actually proper etiquette to give a ring with a protruding jewel? What kind of sadist came up with that tradition? What would be the social consequences to breaking with that tradition? Then the ad was over and I forgot about it for a while but the questions remain unanswered.

news

I was reading the news today... check this out:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23017881/?GT1=10865

To sum it all up for those of you who don't want to read it, this kid got stuck in his washing machine, the firefighters used the jaws of life to cut him out, and the hospital looked him over and sent him home with a stuffed bear. His family named it Agitator.

I am not joking.

Where's that little pill?

Electile Dysfunction

The inability to become aroused over any of the choices for President put forth by either party during an election year.

"Is anyone appealing to you in this years presidential race?"
"Naa... No one excites me. I think I'm suffering from Electile Dysfunction."

(courtesy of UrbanDictionary)

I know that it will go away, and that I will eventually become successful and happy.

But right now I feel like I have failed.

I want to sleeeeeeeeeep....

If you are too impatient to wait for the results of the Indian home remedy, the European home remedy, the Hippy home remedy, the Christian home remedy, and the Eastern Philosophies home remedy, because you are tired and you can't sleep, try a modern take on the Eastern Philosophy of Good Energy And Positive Thoughts, by making yourself a chocolate cake.

vampire insurance

I just ate half a bulb of garlic. You all might want to steer clear of West Milford for a while.

I can't sleep and only got 2 hours last night, so I need something to keep myself from remembering I'm tired. So I'm going to explain why you want to steer clear of Milly.

Garlic contains strong smelling sulfur compounds. When you eat them, your body metabolizes them into allyl methyl sulfide. This cannot be digested and it enters the bloodstream. It is carried to the lungs and skin where it is excreted. That is why, when you eat garlic, you smell like West Virginia.

Now, why did I try to make myself smell like West Virginia? Because a double inner ear infection indicates infection. Last time my ears hinted that there was an infection (almost a year ago) I conquered it with the Indian home remedy Ginger Honey Concoction, the European home remedy Garlic In Oil In Tin Foil With A Little Botulism Sprinkled In, the Hippy home remedy Lots And Lots Of Green Stuff, the Christian home remedy Prayer God And Anointing Oil, and the Eastern Philosophies home remedy Good Energy And Positive Thoughts.

This time around I did all that but left out the garlic, because botulism is no longer in style. But now my ear infections are full-fledged and I can't really take the pain. So, I decided "West Virginia here I come, and bring on the ajoene and allicin." What's that? you ask, and Why did you put scientific words in the same sentence as West Virginia? Aren't they antithetical?

Sure but I'm sick, in pain, and have 2 hours of sleep under my belt and am going to say whatever I darn well please in my blog. Allicin is a compound with antibacterial properties that is created in garlic when you crush it, as a chemical reaction between aliinase and aliin. However, there's not much of it and its not stable, but darn it all, I'm going to ingest whatever IS there. Ajoene is also antimicrobial and is more stable, because it is formed when three allicin molecules bond.

Ahhh I just want to go to sleeeeeeeeeepppppp....

Its back...

I couldn't sleep last night, my throat is killing me, and my ears hurt. Instead of going to church, I was going to sleep. But now I can't sleep cause I'm in pain. I may as well go to church, but everyone already left me at home.

I'm going to OD on herbs that are known to be antiseptic, antibacterial, and antibiotic. If I don't kill myself with them, or bring back my over-active immune system allergies, I'm going to get rid of whatever this is.

I am feeling better

They were right, it was roughly a 24 hour thing. I took a long hot bath last night to fix my sore neck and shoulders and then put a hot pack on it. Its mostly better, but still a little sore.

That doesn't stop me from doing my favorite thing ever: researching facts about plants and herbs. Today's topic from my favorite website: chocolate!

Interesting fact #1: "A study reported by the BBC indicated that melting chocolate in one's mouth produced an increase in brain activity and heart rate that was more intense than that associated with passionate kissing, and also lasted four times as long after the activity had ended."

So guys, when you get her a box of chocolates on that special day, and she kisses you... she's not really excited about you. She's excited about the high she's going to get from the chocolate you gave her.

Interesting fact #2: (Explanation- carob is a commonly used chocolate substitute.) "The term 'carat', the unit by which diamond weight is measured, is also derived from the Greek word kerátiōn (κεράτιων), alluding to an ancient practice of people in the Middle East weighing gold and gemstones against the seeds of the carob tree. The system was eventually standardized and one carat was fixed at 0.2 grams. In late Roman and early Byzantine times the pure gold coin known as the solidus weighed 24 carat seeds (about 4.5 grams). As a result, the carat also became a measure of purity for gold. Thus 24 carat gold means 100% pure, 12 carat gold means the alloy contains 50% gold, etc."

So guys, when you get her jewelry, just remember you can't do it without the carob tree!

(Incidentally, the seeds of the carob tree are also called locust beans. It is sometimes thought that the references in the Bible to John the Baptist eating locusts and honey are actually referring to locust beans and honey, which seems more palatable to me.)

And speaking of the Bible, I found an awesome article at cracked.com Just beware of language, for all you sensitive people. I would rate this PG-13.

Why pandas are going extinct...

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=vids.individual&VideoID=24330952

Imagine I am a male panda. I look at a female panda. Instead of thinking, "yes, this is something I want to mate with," I think, "Oh how cute, I want to cuddle." Pandas are going extinct because they are busy being cuddly instead of sexy.

Cooties

Technically, I have a fever even though my temperature at the moment is 98.5. My normal healthy temperature is actually below average for most people, at 96.8. So I'm 2.7 degrees high. Actually, 1.7 degrees. Apparently having a fever doesn't change how bad your math skills are. I'm pretty sure I hit a hundred last night though. It was crazy. The walls in my room were pulsing.

Supposedly this thing is only a 24-hour bug so I should be feeling better an hour ago, but I still have a pounding headache, and for some reason, my shoulders also have a headache. I don't really know how to explain that but its not just achy shoulders, its like there's a headache IN my shoulders. Whatever.

My former roommate, Kat, put this video in her blog, and it really cheered me up.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w6ylxWcwkUM

It happened...

My body has finally succumbed to the illnesses surrounding me. I feel like I am going to die. I'm going to bed.

burning spirit

Jeremiah 5:14
Therefore this is what the Lord God Almighty says: "Because the people have spoken these words, I will make my words in your mouth a fire and these people the wood it consumes."

God goes on to tell Jeremiah what words to say to them. I am having the same sensation, my only problem is I don't know what the words are. I feel like my spirit or soul is on fire, with some great revelation burning to get out of me, but I don't know what it is. Its slowly sinking lower into the pit of my stomach, and its not heartburn, even though it is so strong spiritually or emotionally that its nearly physical.

something different

I needed a break from sick people and cats so I went to Steve's only to discover him coughing and wheezing. I'm tired of writing about it though so here's something different, in light of the number of female babies being born or in the works.

Rodney Atkins:

The Declaration of Independence, Think I could tell you that first sentence But then I’m lost.
I can't begin to count the theories I've had pounded in my head That I forgot.
I don't remember all that Spanish Or the Gettysburg address, But there is one speech from high school I'll never forget:

(Chorus)
Come on in boy sit on down And tell me about yourself. So you like my daughter do you now?
Yeah we think she's something else, She's her daddy's girl, Her momma's world. She deserves respect; That’s what she'll get, Ain’t it son? Hey y'all run along and have some fun, I'll see you when you get back. Bet I’ll be up all night Still cleanin' this gun.

Well now that I’m a father, I’m scared to death one day my daughter Is gonna find That teenage boy I used to be, That seems to have just one thing on his mind.
She’s growin' up so fast It won't be long before I’ll have to put the fear of god into Some kid at the door.

(Chorus)

Now it's all for show, Ain’t nobody gonna get hurt; It’s just a daddy thing- And hey, believe me, man it works

(Chorus)

Son, now y'all buckle up and have her back by te- let's say about nine...thirty. Drive safe.

Its all my brother's fault.

Normally, the cats sleep about 30 hours in any given 24-hour period. But Jack has been sleeping a little more lately and when the girls were playing, he didn't seem too interested.

I watched him for a while, as he sat purring, and realized his nose seems rattly, like its congested. He has goobers in his eyes and every once in a while stops purring long enough to swallow... sound like post-nasal drip to anyone? The clincher was when he started a wheezing cough, which was only a one time thing, and I haven't heard it since. I put some echinacea drops on his paw so he would lick it. I don't think he liked that.

The bottom line is, I know people can catch viruses from animals... can cats catch viruses from people?

Ooo eee ooo ahhahh

...Ching chang wada bada bing bang...

So my brother took his antibiotics and his sinus infection left. About a week ago, he finished the pills.

This morning, the phone rang... all I really wanted to do was sleep. I turned the ringer off, and it rang again. It was my brother, calling from his bedroom. He wanted a massage because he was sick.

Me: What's wrong?
Him: I'm sick.
Me: Yeah but what's wrong with you?
Him: I feel like I'm dying.
Me: Well there's no cure for death, so I don't know what to tell you.
Him: I have to go lie down or I'm going to collapse.

So I wrung it out of him that he's not dizzy, he's feeling faint, has a fever, a sore throat, a headache, and a runny nose. On top of that, mom's not home and the cats are crying to be fed. So I groaned (here we go again), gave up on the thought of 10 more minutes in bed, took some Red Date tea for stress, and doped him up with all the herbal junk we've got in the house, hoping one would stick.

Luckily he has a doctor's appointment at the allergist/asthma therapist today, and the Dr. is a very nice one who will also help him out, not necessarily in the medication sense. Our family doctor would just prescribe something, regardless, but Dr. Weiss listens to his patients and doesn't always tell them they need medicine.

So that's my day so far. Here's the witch doctor, signing out.

Predicament

My violets have mites which seem to be spreading to the other plants in the house. I have a little ladybug friend who has been doing a good deal of cleaning of the plants, however, she is only one and the mites are quite numerous. I bought an organic pesticide that smells like it could kill me if I so much as spill it on the carpet. My problem is that if it does its job, my ladybug will starve, but if I let her live, all my plants will die. I wish there were a bug Lady could eat that didn't kill plants.

prayer

Everybody I see at church these days is offering to pray for me. Even though I have wanted prayer, I have not asked. They just come up and offer it. I wonder how they know. Can they see it in my face?

Finished

I have just finished the project I have been working on since late October, and approximately 66% of the babies for which I was knitting have been born.

I feel like, aside from Christmas, there was nothing else getting me out of bed in the morning. Now that it is done, I am not sure what to do with myself. I have a strange sense of emptiness, like I no longer know who I am. I've been pretending to fix up my life but I really don't know what needs fixing. It sounds stupid, that sounds like I'm a drug addict or something, but the real truth is that I am not happy with who I am, the boring college graduate who didn't do anything with her life, who purposely doesn't live any adventures, and can't seem to get up the energy to make a few phone calls, and send out a few job applications, who doesn't have the energy to call the damn nutrition office about a graduate degree because she's been telling everyone she doesn't really know what she wants in life but in actuality there's really nothing at all that she wants.

No, I don't really feel like that all the time...
Sometimes I feel like this:


And other times I feel like this:


Since I have been working on this post on and off for about 4 1/2 hours, I am currently not any of the above, but am feeling like this:

How to sing country

Back in November, I posted an article I had found titled "How to Sing the Blues" and lamented the fact that there wasn't one for singing country.

So, in case any of you wanted to try to sing country, I've decided to give you a few guidelines.

1. Locations. Country songs take place in the country. The only reason to mention a city is a Hobby or a Woman (see #2 and #3).
1a. Reno, Dallas, Houston, Tallahassee, and Nashville are acceptable cities.
1b. Las Vegas is not acceptable unless you're going there with a woman (see #3.)
1c. Its better to mention a state than a town no one has heard of.
~Tennessee, Oklahoma, Alabama, Texas, Carolina, and Mississippi are acceptable.
~Maine, Vermont and New Hampshire, no.
~By no means should you mention New York or New Jersey, unless your woman left you and moved there.
~Florida is ok if it rhymes with something
~Don't use North and South designations (Carolina and Dakota), but you are allowed to say West Virginia.
1d. If a town name is unavoidable, it should contain a reference to the land (Smokey Hollow), to nature (Lonesome Dove), or end in -ham (Birmingham). Spanish names are ok, if they are in Arizona, New Mexico, or Texas.
1e. Place-preposition pairings such as in the woods, out in the back pasture, on a lonely highway, down by the creek, and in an empty diner, are all useful as well. If you must name a river, you can only use the Mississippi or the Rio Grande. Work your story around to make it make sense. If this is impossible, you should GRUDGINGLY call it Snake River or Green River.
1f. Dixie is a magical place name. No one knows exactly where this place is, but when you're there, you know it.

2. Hobbies. Its good to have something to do while you are waiting for the crops to grow, or for the cows to come home.
2a. Musical instruments are good, if they are string or percussion. Fiddles and banjos are excellent, by no means should you ever mention a saxophone. A jaw harp or harmonica will help you achieve a lonesome feel, but those don't rhyme well.
2b. Playing cards are good, especially poker. References are better ("don't mess with the king's queen") and references to cheating at the game are excellent. ("aces up his sleeves")
2c. Fishing is good, boating is ok.
2d. Falling in love is a supreme pastime (see #3).
2f. Hunting is only ok if you mention your dog, and he should be named for a color.
2g. If you are not a hunter, your horse is your best friend, but he never gets a name. He is always a "he" unless your mare is the only woman in your life.
2h. Rodeo. This is the best way to have fun practicing all the things you need to know to run a farm anyway. Be careful with this one. It can take you away from home and ruin your life.
2i. Go to church. When you have a lot of time on your hands and you don't want to do other hobbies, its better to go to church than to be idle (= the devil's workshop). You can do other things too, but never mention that you do them on a Sunday. Do them another day, even if you are out late Saturday night.
2j. Made up games (kneeboarding in the mud behind your boyfriend's tractor trailer) are always acceptable, but usually do not appear in the lyrics, they show up in the music video, which is disappointing, but an unavoidable fact of country music.

3. Women. Women are essential to the country way of life. They can cook, clean, raise kids, hunt, fish, give you good lovin,' down as many shots of whiskey as you can, help you with the crop or the cows, and can fight along with the rest of the men. They can do everything. They are goddesses, but only occasionally do they look like goddesses. They also have a knack for getting tired of your hobbies and leaving you. A good country song would be a love song to her, praising her inward beauty and, if she's got it, her outward beauty. She doesn't even have to leave you in the song, just tell her how much you love her. You could also sing about how you met, what you thought when you first saw her, and what you did together when you were seventeen. Usually, the girl you grow up with is the one you marry (probably because you don't meet any new people unless you leave your town).

4. Men. For the women who want to sing country, a note about your relationship with the men. Quite often, they never went to college, but you did if you didn't run away at 17. They are good men, treat you well, and run the farm well. Truckers can sing country but trucker's wives can't, so your man runs a farm. You are madly in love with him, but you are still practical and won't admit it too openly, which he doesn't mind because he's madly in love with you and is ok singing about it. If he cheats on you, its not his fault, its the tramp's fault, which is why its so hard for you to move on when you leave him. So you sing about your man even though you don't want to see him again.

5. Names.
5a. Women always get good names. Often, its acceptable just to use feminine pronouns, but sometimes you need good, solid, down to earth names. Norma, Sue, Betty, Jean and Caroline are good. If you are reminiscing about a very pretty girl, any name that sounds Native American would be a good choice.
5b. Men don't get named as much. Best friends or heroes get solid names like Bob, Bill, Willy, Tom, Hank, or Johnny. Bad guys get adjectives in front of their names: Bad Bill, Wild Bill, Shady Hank.
5c. Your parents are "my old man," if you don't like him much, or "papa" and "mama."

6. Conflict. Country music is a story, stories have conflict. Your father beat you, your mother left or sent you away. The crops all died, or else the cows did. No one ever gets murdered unless they are cheating on a lover. The state took your land, you miss your wife because you are a trucker, or she misses you because you follow a rodeo circuit. You can't support your kids. You fondly remember when times were good and they aren't now. Or you somehow wound up in jail. Despite all this, you never turn to drugs, and you are never ever EVER suicidal. You are ok with crying about it. When things get very bad, you find a buddy at a bar. Your bar will ALWAYS have either a pool table or a jukebox.

7. Alcohol. You can sing about what happens when you drink it, you can sing about what causes you to drink it (usually seeing her with him), you can sing about it ruining your life or you can sing about it helping you forget her, or make new friends. Whiskey, Beer, and Tequila are good drinks for you. So are Jack Daniels, Jim Bean, and Captain Morgan (just don't mention "rum"). Champagne only if you are being ironic. Don't drink wine unless you are drinking and in love, and avoid martinis and anything "on the rocks." Leave tonic and gin to Billy Joel. Mixed drinks, absolutely not.

8. To keep your audience interested, try puns or a turn of phrase. Famous examples are: "He had an angel's heart and the devil's hand." "We're two of a kind, working on a full house." "Don't make me come over there... and love you." "Why should we both fall apart, lets fall to pieces together." "I can saddle up fast, get you there first class long before the dawn, you know your male's gonna get to you, come snow, rain, sleet, or hail..." "he's an angel with no halo, and one wing in the fire."

9. When you have sung enough country music to be famous, you can branch out a little. Sing about something unusual like Mexico, or something abstract like a great realization you have come upon about life. In this stage, its okay to break the rules a little, like singing about a pina colada, or a woman named Lillian.

10. If your career is not picking up, try singing about a soldier in a war somewhere. Women singing country should sing about the soldier's wife. Its been done over and over, but for some reason, America still loves it.

Lastly, its not a rule but an observation. Despite your woman leaving you, the cows dying, and the state taking over the farm, your songs have an upbeat rhythm, and cheerful notes. Even if nothing positive comes out of your mouth, your song still has hope hidden somewhere inside of it. The only thing left is for the audience to look for and find that hope.

And I guess that kind of explains why I like country music despite (as Anissa always points out) the continual use of the one, three, and five chords.

Ice Skating!

We had a nice cold snap, just before it hit 65 degrees. I dragged Steve out on the ice with me, knowing it was going to melt soon. Since my other pictures went into Myspace, I thought I'd treat you all to a blogger exclusive:

Steve being cold.


Some of the hockey players actually came over to see if he needed an ambulance or anything.




Blurry picture because the cold was killing the batteries.


Testing out the NEW batteries. Not blurry at all!


For some reason, I seem to take tons of pictures of feet for my photo albums.


Me trying to hide the fact that I haven't been on skates in a couple of years.


I'm flyyyyyy-inggggg!

Sad news

I have just been told that Professor Okazaki-Mullins has passed away. If you do not know much about Jujitsu, then no doubt you will not have heard of her. She is the daughter of the founder of our style of Jujitsu. Her father initially taught a separate set of techniques to his female students, in a time when it was rare for a Sensei even to have female students. Following in her father's footsteps, many of the classes she taught at the conventions I have been to were women-only classes. I learned quite a lot of things in the few hours I have spent in her classes at convention, but it seems like way too short a time. Just watching her, it is evident that she possesses an understanding of Jujitsu that many people will never attain. While I did not know her well enough to mourn her passing, I experienced her teaching enough to experience a strong sense of loss at this news. I am sure that there are many people in the Jujitsu community that are experiencing a real mourning today, and my heart goes out to them.

WOW

I'm normally not political at all. I hate political conversations, politics, and politicians. I am convinced that none of them really want (or have the capability) to fix all of the problems in our society. They all just pick the issues that THEY see as the biggest problems and fix those, causing OTHER problems to get bigger, which another candidate might see as the one that should have been fixed first.

What I have just realized, thanks to a blog entry from a friend, is about our voting system. I have not done the research but I have heard these statistics many times. Only about half of the US population actually turns out to vote, and roughly half vote Republican and half Democrat, with the occasional vote for an independent party. What I have just realized is that every other time I have heard those statistics, I have been hearing only the STATISTICS. I never focused on the other half of the US that doesn't vote. Why don't they vote??

Well then my train of thought turned back to me. Why didn't I vote in the last election? 1. I had not made the time in my schedule to educate myself about the candidates prior to the election and was unwilling to make an uneducated decision. 2. What little I did know about the candidates made me certain that I did not want any of them to be in a position of leadership over me.

While it is highly likely that a majority of America is just plain stupid and doesn't know enough to vote, I also think that it is possible that there are people out there who don't vote because they don't want any of the candidates to be president. Our ballots could be made so much better if in addition to putting "Kerry, Clinton, Obama, Huckabee, Guiliani, and whoever else wants control" on the ballot, they would also put "Not Kerry, Not Clinton, Not Obama, Not Huckabee, and Not Guiliani" on the ballot. American ballot-makers have accounted for this by allowing us to write in names of people we would like to see in the office for which we are voting, knowing full well that the American public is not coordinated enough for it to actually make a difference. But, if people were allowed to vote AGAINST a candidate, perhaps the statistics researchers would find that we can elect a president not based on the opinions of 25% of the population, but by 50% or 75% of the population.

Granted... adding an option like that to the ballot would cost millions, especially just in advertising. There would have to be a media hype so that the people who don't vote will know they have a new option. Then there would have to be educational seminars for the people who have been voting the old way to learn how to incorporate the new options. Then there would have to be people at the voting stations to tell the people who slept through the educational seminars what to do. Then there would have to be more people just outside the voting booths for the idiots who still don't get it and can't adapt to change (the ones Darwin thinks should have died a long time ago).

Ok so, its not really a feasible plan. But I think that having the option to say on a ballot "I don't want any of these people" would attract more voters. And it would cause problems if 70% of America didn't want anyone to rule them. But at least then, it would actually be the case that "the people have spoken," instead of, "a quarter of the people have spoken."

Pictures

At this very moment, I am uploading pictures to Myspace that include my super mario brother, walks in the woods, scenic lookouts, kitty porn, and christmas trees.

If you do not have a myspace account, and would like me to post some pictures here, you have to let me know. Say yes, and I will.

I wonder

What would happen if the paparazzi stopped following the celebrity sluts and started following US senators, government officials, and basically anyone in the perimeter of Washington DC? Imagine the scandals we could uncover. Brittany and Lindsay and Paris need a break. They are just young women with no significant parental guidance and as much as I disagree with their actions and agree with the consequences of their actions, there is no need for me to know about it. The really juicy stuff happens in DC, not Hollywood. So why are the paparazzi following strung out blond chicks?

4:30 AM

After a long dry spell, a long hard cry, a long argument with a human voice of reason, I am now equipped to argue with God.

God, I'm trying really hard to do whatever it is that you have planned for my life but I can't seem to find a direction that I think you want me to go. I feel like you are letting me down by not telling me what I should do.

I have summed it up a bit, the real conversation sounded more like a temper tantrum.

And God says, "You aren't listening."

And when I listen, I hear the voices of reason, I see myself deliberately avoiding some of the people who make the most sense, and I don't hear God. I only hear the voices of reason. But who is to say that those voices are not the voice of God? Can it be that they are there because he wants me to listen to voices of reason instead of him? Can it be that he doesn't want to make the decision for me? Can it be that he wants me to put on my big girl panties?

How many of you thought I was incredibly sacrilegious for thinking that God would ever say "put on your big girl panties"? How many of you shot milk out your nose?

After struggling with the issue for a long time, I am finally able to bring my mood out of the depths a little and go to bed with some light humor on my mind.

First watch this video: Carrie Underwood

Then watch the new version: go here and under "featured videos" click the second one down (look for the word Cletus).

For the record, God and I have reached an understanding. Or rather, I have reached an understanding. God always had it I think. But that doesn't mean my life is great because of it. It just means I get it.

my celebrity lookalike

Its strange because I'm not Asian, Indian, Greek or Italian and yet those are the ethnicities that popped up. I don't even know who these people are, except Sigourney Weaver. And I have her nose.



Lets try it again. More Asians, do I really look Asian, people? And what is that guy doing in there?? (Kate Beckinsale was in the list too, but her picture looked awful so I thought I would spare you all the grief.)

http://www.myheritage.com/collage

Christmas Shopping

I was helping Steve pick out some gifts today, and as we were walking past a kiosk full of hair products, I heard the dreaded question:

"Excuse me, miss, can I ask you a question?"
"No." With a brief thought about whether or not to be incredibly rude, I began to continue walking.
"But you have such great curly hair."

Ok now I have no qualms about walking onward. She OBVIOUSLY was not talking to me, or else she was retarded and won't remember that I was rude to her.

The Eunuch in the Royal Court

Another little snippet:

Jack is losing his manhood tomorrow as punishment for humping his sisters. Just because his parents are siblings doesn't mean incest is unpunishable. They both got their punishments too.

I can't sleep

I've been trying to sleep for quite some time now, and I'm still very alert. So, I have decided to write now what I had been planning to put off until tomorrow or the next day or never.

Its kind of a question about where my spiritual life is right now. Sometimes I feel that I may have taken God out of the "God" spot in my life, and put some other little god in His place. Other times I am angry with God for not being as fulfilling as other aspects of my life. Isn't God supposed to be satisfying? Sometimes its as simple as feeling that I'm no longer clean, that I stopped following God and started playing in the pigpen. And other times its as complicated as saying that I've been taken hostage in the enemy camp, that its not my fault I'm not with God and am trying hard to get back home.

All of these feelings revolve around a particular series of events in my life, and things have been slowly deteriorating over the years. A few years ago, I never would have dreamed that a parable about the Christian journey would shake me so much and make me question my eternity.

Twila Paris:

Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that I'm amazing
Strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of me
I'm hiding all the tears

^ Who I was a few years ago ^

(Chorus)
They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
'Cause deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child

^ Who I am now ^

snippets

1. I discovered today that we have enough food in the basement pantry and freezer to survive a very long zombie attack.

2. I discovered I should not have a phone. I don't pick mine up, and I don't answer voicemails. I am a very bad phone owner.

Side Note

House, M.D. is a great TV show. America needs lighthearted stuff like Scrubs, but actors need shows like House. Watching House almost makes me wish to be on stage again.

BS or MS?

Well, I hope none of you out there have been going through withdrawal from not hearing from me. I haven't really been incredibly busy, just kind of bored with life, so I haven't written about the exciting things, or the annoying things, or anything like that.

But I did want to chronicle a few things, just cause they happened and should be put down in the record of my life.

On December 8, Steve and I went to the mall for a few Christmas gifts. We ran out of the mall when we suddenly realized our next "activity" started at 5, not 6. Our next activity actually happened to start at 5:30 so we ended up being right on time. It was a ballroom dance workshop hosted by the RU Ballroom Dance Club, and DJ'ed by Steve's ballroom dance teacher. For the entire past semester Steve has been taking ballroom and then teaching me everything he knows (except how to be a good lead dancer), so the workshop was good for both of us. When it was over, we rushed over to Steve's place where I changed out of my junky clothes into some nice ones (with dancing shoes!) and wrapped up a gift. Then we rushed over to Stuff Yer Face, where Taylor was having her birthday party, and we ate something, and Steve bought me a Lambic which was nice of him. It was good too, haha nice and sweet. Then we rushed back to the gym, or actually the Chocolate Ballroom as it was called in the flyer. Basically it was a place to ballroom dance, and eat free chocolate laced with things you are allergic to like peanut butter. Not me, Steve. We did that until almost midnight and then went back to Steve's place, where Taylor and Navin were just arriving with an ice cream cake from Thomas Sweets'. While flipping through the channels, Navin stopped on the History Channel so we could get a detailed documentary on the History of Sex. Did you know that table skirts were invented in Victorian England because people thought that men were so horny that the sight of any "leg," even just a table leg, would cause them to fall short of the glory of God?

Anyway, that was one of the more enjoyable times I've had in a while.

Compare to the following Monday, where I was given 24-hour warning that I had scheduled a dental appointment a few months ago. Thanks to the jujitsu kids' class end-of-session party on Thursday, visiting Taylor and Anissa on Friday and eating dessert from Delicious Orchards, a Chocolate Ballroom and an ice cream cake on Saturday, and all sorts of leftovers from all of that on Sunday, I was pretty ready to have my teeth worked on. I had been nursing cavities since I graduated in '06 and thought my insurance ran out. When I discovered it didn't, I ran to the dentist, but he didn't have an opening for several months, which is why I had forgotten until last minute that I had the appointment. This is only the second time I met this guy, so I was a little unsure that I wanted him drilling holes in me, but it was something that had been put off way too long. He has this contraption that administers the anesthetic so that he doesn't have to measure it or something. He inserts the needle into my left upper gumline, and then the machine starts sending out the numby stuff. A computerized voice talks to him to tell him when to stop. I don't speak Dentist though so I don't know how much of it I got. It was in there for a long time. Then he went over to the top right gumline and the whole process started over. Then he says "I'm not drilling very deep on the bottom jaw so I'm not going to numb that one." Basically "Suck it up." All in all the entire process took 2 hours, and I'm not sure how many contraptions were in my mouth all at once. The worst thing was the sander, which basically vibrated my entire skull, sinuses included, and made my nose run, but my head was back, so it basically ran down the back of my throat. At one point he told me to stop and swish my mouth out with water, and I started to but then it all squirted out because I couldn't move my lips. I had to pinch them together with my fingers. It felt like a stroke on both sides of my face. When I got home I thought I would lie down on my bed for a little while, just to enjoy the feel of not having any drills, picks, mouth vacuums, fingers, or mirrors in my mouth. I woke up at 9 pm, having missed Monday night jujitsu. Apparently, local anesthetic, when applied in the proper quantities, actually does knock a person out. It just takes too long and surgeons get impatient, so they invented the heavy duty anesthesia for them.

I spent the rest of my week making Christmas gifts, and now, I suppose, you all are caught up.

I need to find a school and narrow down my choices as far as my entire future is concerned. And I think I need to stop being afraid to screw up. I guess in some ways, I feel like I screwed up when it comes to the major I chose, even though it was the best thing for me at the time. I'm dragging my feet with this finding another degree to pursue, because I don't want to give up on it in a few years.

dry

I had a dream last night where everything was going wrong. My head was pounding (not painful, just pressure) and the sound of the blood in my head made a whoosh sound, which my brain worked into the plot of the dream in several different manifestations. When I woke up I realized my head was pounding and it wasn't strange noises on the phone or the sound of lawn furniture spinning around on a turntable, but actually blood whooshing in my head. I also am really dehydrated (since my feet and hands are dry and crackly feeling, and my lips are chapped). The funny thing is, I drank at least 6 glasses of water yesterday and it went through me. I am wondering what kind of medical problem could cause the body to reject water. I don't feel sick though. Just dry.

On the psychoanalytic end of things, the dream suggests that I am having issues with vulnerability, taking care of the future, living a productive life, caring for the things I love, fear of those things turning on me, and keeping my life clean and in order. Great.

Breaking News!

Puca learned how to meow!

Its about as exciting as a baby taking his first steps, or saying a word for the first time. She's so proud of herself that now she meows any time you look at her.

How to sing the Blues

I got this from KarenKool's blog, and she did not write it. So we have no idea where it came from but its really awesome. I think there should be one about country music too.

EDIT: I did a little research, and this writing appears to have been written by Judith Podell in 1997 for Wordrights Magazine. Thanks Judith for an awesome essay!



1. Most Blues begin “woke up this mornin'.”

2. “I got a good woman” is a bad way to begin the Blues, unless you stick something nasty in right away: "I got a good woman—with the meanest face in town."

3. Blues are simple. After you have the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes. Sort of.
I got a good woman with the meanest face in town.
I got a good woman with the meanest face in town.
She got teeth like Margaret Thatcher
And she weighs 500 pounds.

4. The Blues are not about limitless choice.
You stuck in a ditch,
You stuck in a ditch;
Ain't no way out.

5. Blues cars are Chevies, Cadillacs and broken down trucks. Other acceptable Blues transportation modes include Greyhound buses and southbound trains. Walkin’ plays a major part in the Blues lifestyle. So does fixin’ to die. Blues don't travel in Volvos, BMWs, or SUVs. Jet aircraft and state sponsored motor pools ain't even in the running.

6. Adults sing the Blues. Teenagers can’t sing the Blues. They ain't fixin' to die yet. In the Blues, "adulthood" means old enough to get the electric chair when you shoot that man in Memphis.

7. You can have the Blues in New York City, but not in Brooklyn or Queens. Hard times in Vermont, Tucson, or North Dakota are just depression. The best places to have the Blues are still Chicago, St. Louis, and Kansas City. You cannot have the blues in any place that don't get rain.

8. Breaking your leg while skiing is not the blues. Breaking your leg when your broken down pickup truck rolled over on it is.

9. The following colors do not belong in the Blues: violet, beige, mauve (unless you’re truly desperate for a rhyme).

10. You can’t have the Blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is just plain wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.

11. Good places to have the Blues: the highway, a jailhouse, an empty bed, the bottom of a whiskey glass. Bad places to have the Blues: ashrams, gallery openings, weekends in the Hamptons, golf courses.

12. No one will believe it’s the Blues if you wear a suit, unless you happen to be an old black man—and it’s an old black suit.

13. Do you have the right to sing the Blues?

Answer “Yes” if:
a. your first name is a southern state—like Georgia
b. you’re blind
c. you shot a man in Memphis.
d. you can’t be satisfied.

Answer “No” if:
a. you once were blind but now can see.
b. you’re deaf
c. the man in Memphis lived.
d. you have a trust fund or an IRA.

14. Blues is not about color, it's about bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the blues; Gary Coleman could. Ugly old white people got a leg up on the blues. Julio Iglesias and Barbra Streisand will never sing the Blues.

15. If you ask for water and baby gives you gasoline, it’s the Blues. Other acceptable Blues beverages are: wine, whiskey, muddy water, black coffee. Blues beverages are NOT: mixed drinks, kosher wine, sparkling water or Snapple (all flavors).

16. If it occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it’s a Blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is a Blues death. So is substance abuse, the electric chair, or being denied treatment in an emergency room. It is not a Blues death to die during liposuction or from tennis elbow.

17. Excellent names...
For female Blues singers: Sadie, Big Momma, Bessie, or Fat River Dumpling.
For male Blues singers: Willie, Joe, Little Willie, Lightning, or Big Willie.
Singers with names like Muffy, Sierra, Auburn, Sequoia, Brittany or Rainbow are not permitted to sing the Blues, no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.

18. Here's a Build Your Own Blues Singer Name Starter Kit:
a. Name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, Asthmatic)
b. First name (from above lists) or name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Kiwi)
c. Last name of a U. S. president (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.)

Examples: Blind Lime Jefferson, Cripple Kiwi Fillmore, etc. Okay, maybe not "Kiwi".

visiting

Today I got to spend time with Steve's family. We went to a really great sushi bar and I managed to work up the courage to try a piece with seared scallop in it. I tried seared tuna once before but it was very seared, closer to medium-well than medium-rare. This scallop was the real deal, and is the closest I have been to ingesting raw fish. One of these days, I will work up the courage to be a real bird of prey and eat it raw. Carnivores be proud, I did try beef tartar once. It was beefy. And raw. That's a story for another blog; in fact, it was blogged here. (In case you were wondering, the lobster and scallop in the sushi roll blended nicely and were very creamy. They didn't taste "fishy" at all and the texture of the scallop was not as "raw" as I expected.

We also watched Love Actually, which is the best Christmas movie I think will ever be made. Most of the Christmas movies focus on Christmas, this one focuses on relationships. Its not a children's Christmas movie. At the same time though, sometimes you have to hate a movie simply because there's a single line in it that drives you crazy because it hits you deep in the center of your gut. I kinda feel that way about Love Actually.

Steve's brother also opened up a bottle of ice wine for us to try. I had never had it before, but it was definitely good. Unfortunately, it seems I have expensive tastes in alcohol, with Lambic beer, champagne, some white wines and now ice wine. I suppose that's really a good thing, safer for me that way.

All in all it was a good day and I am really blessed that Steve's family allowed me to join them in their family traditions today.

Potluck and Louis

So, today was the post-Thanksgiving Potluck at Cara's house. We started the meal off with a general "So, I guess we should be thankful and sh#$," followed by a toast to Marco, who is not deceased but simply not at any organized functions. After that came a great number of quotable moments, all of which I have forgotten due to my inability to write them down at the moment. I believe Joyce had a good one, but alas, they are all lost to me.

After dinner we broke out the good ol' game of Cranium. Team Bench, Team Couch, Team Asia and Team Alcohol began competing for the title of Brain Masters. While Team Asia led the way most of the time, Team Alcohol managed to catch up and win with the help of the lucky penny. Notable moments included the realization that the die will always land on yellow unless you actually want it to land on yellow, and the great performance award of the night went to Andrew. He was supposed to read the person's name on the card, then act out clues by singing or speaking the way the person would. The timer started, and he just sat there, prompting the guess "Helen Keller." When he finally moved into action, we were surprised by the best Louis Armstrong imitation ever. Unfortunately, Jess guessed Grover, and Steve guessed the correct name after the timer was up, and no one could believe that Louis Armstrong's name had been forgotten.

After the losers had to eat Steve's muffins (which were excellent and only looked a little dark), most of us left. Steve and I continued on to another party involving his high school friends, and a TON more food. We had just missed a few rounds of Hoopla, which is a Cranium spin-off. After dinner, they were tired of Hoopla, so guess which game ended up open on the living room floor? Thats right, I found myself in yet another game of Cranium involving a Team Couch. Even though it was a different set, the die still persistently landed on yellow, Humdingers was still the worst category next to Copycat, and Club Craniums were still just as chaotic.

The best moment from this game however was when Steve had to act out a person. He stood up and began mimicking huge steps, then remembered he could talk. "Thats one small step for man..." So we fumbled with shouting out astronaut names until we remembered "Neil Armstrong." At that, Steve paused, set back. It was the wrong person. Then a flash of inspiration: "I see skies of blue..." and of course that was all I needed to get the name and satisfy the ghost of Louis Armstrong that he will not be forgotten.

Through a series of events the lucky penny ended up in my pocket, but it was not as lucky for me as it was for Cara, and I was once again not on the winning team. I will have to give it back to her next time I see her.

And that was all that I can remember about this eventful day. Goodnight!

Jesus vs. Satan

Jesus and Satan were having an on-going argument about who was better on the computer. They had been going at it for days, and frankly God was tired of hearing all the bickering.

Finally fed up, God said, "THAT'S IT! I have had enough. I am going to set up a test that will run for two hours, and from those results, I will judge who does the better job."

So Satan and Jesus sat down at the keyboards and typed away.
They moused.
They faxed.
They e-mailed.
They e-mailed with attachments.
They downloaded.
They did spreadsheets!
They wrote reports.
They created labels and cards.
They created charts and graphs.
They did some genealogy reports.
They did every job known to man.
Jesus worked with heavenly efficiency and Satan was faster than hell.

Then, ten minutes before their time was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the power went off. Satan stared at his blank screen and screamed every curse word known in the underworld. Jesus just sighed. Finally the electricity came back on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:

"It's gone! It's all GONE! "I lost everything when the power went out!"

Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work. Satan observed this and became irate.

"Wait!" he screamed. "That's not fair! He cheated! How come he has all his work and I don't have any?"

God just shrugged and said,
JESUS SAVES !

Being Thankful...

How are your relatives doing? You had to ask, I knew you would. Ehh here's the scoop, most of them ditched NJ this year. P and D went to NY, M and E went to Florida, Uncle whatever his name is stayed in California like always... I don't remember what his name is. B and T stayed in GA, B and J stayed in Maryland with the kids and grandkids. P is just the second coming of G; she's just like her sister and as rude as ever, I wonder why T was/is interested in them. (No, this particular family is not inbred, it just has a lot of non-genetic relations.) J was actually sober when we walked in but that changed by dinner time. J2 was surprisingly allowing affection, which means she may be healing a bit better from her grief than last time I saw her. And K and A were dutiful and have life figured out, like always.

Ok that was exciting.

Now for the part where I list the things I'm thankful for. I know everyone does this but I am in a place right now where the list is short enough to be acceptable material for a blog.

1. I am thankful that my mom and dad and brother and I enjoy being in each other's company, and that we can spend hours laughing at the dinner table.

2. I am thankful that I have a few select friends who allow me to totally open up to them and who genuinely try to help me and love me.

3. I am thankful for Jack because he lets me see a simple life.

4. I am thankful for Steve. I am thankful for his strength and his pep-talks, and his logical brain that keeps me from over analyzing into the realm of impossible. I am thankful that he is observant and romantic and knows when to cheer me up and when to run for cover.

Thats all I have to say right now. I feel like a lot of things have been stripped from my life that if I had them, I'd be thankful for them but I don't have them and I am learning that it is possible to live without all that. So this is my list. Thats all I have to say. Be thankful people. Don't just enjoy this holiday for the undercooked turkey and the cavity sweet potatoes and the wine and cigars and days off of work. Think about what you can't live without.

PS. I am also thankful for Pocky. Google it if you don't know.

The second snowfall... and HENNA

Friday morning we woke up to this, the second snowfall of the year.


On Tuesday, I renewed my henna hair. Its not as vibrant this time around because NJ has no sunlight in November.

overheard

"cupid shot that arrow through a glass cross."

huh?

Bad movie titles.

Although this article sometimes bashes the movies as well as the titles, the emphasis is really that Hollywood takes advantage of its movie-going audience by tacking a really stupid name onto a decent or perhaps really good movie. Here are my favorites:

"Octopussy (1983)
OK, we all get the thing about Bond films and winking, leering, in-the-know double entendre. But the penultimate Bond film featuring Roger Moore was completely out of hand. It doesn't even qualify as double entendre. It barely qualifies as single entendre. It's just porno. And bad, stale, old-man porno at that. Porno with a bad toupee and a body double for the stunts. Double-oh-nothing.

Free Willy (1993)
Uh... what can one say about a movie called "Free Willy," particularly one aimed at kids that features a theme song by Michael Jackson. If "Octopussy" is intentionally graphic with a coy wink, this title is the photo negative: a blatant double entendre screaming to be born that goes completely unacknowledged by the film itself. It's hard to know which is worse, but because this film has a magical killer whale who learns to love a young boy ... oh, never mind."

Am I going to hell for this?

I am craving an alcoholic beverage for the simple reason that I am not pregnant.

I am thinking about random vacations or potentially long-term vacations simply because I am not married and have no career to speak of.

Despite the fact that I am not pregnant, I still feel justified in making strange food concoctions like White Chocolate Milk Chocolate Hazelnut Irish Cream Coffee and yes it has genuine caffeine in it. Why? Because there's no medical reason not to.

There might be something wrong with me. Its just too mean to enjoy things other people can't. Right?

blog quizzes

Earlier this week I was feeling kind of down. So when Steve went to the store to pick up some Italian bread, he came back with a bouquet of flowers. It really picked my mood up off the ground.








While I have the camera out, I may as well show you all some flowers from around my house. Even in November, our stuff is still flowering. This is quite unusual for my house.






My parents left for Cape Cod Friday morning. An hour after they left, I was up, out of bed, and cleaning the house. I hung things that have been waiting to be hung for years, I moved the mattress from my old apartment out of the dining room and into the basement, covered it up so the cats can't destroy it, moved the dining room table up against the wall so there's less room for mom to store things on it, and then made dinner and watched three movies straight so that I could get my knitting done (I have to keep my mind busy while I knit). It was productive.

That night we had our first snowfall. I woke up Saturday morning to see it already melting, but when it first came down it was a little less than an inch deep. It had been raining all day so it was good that it didn't stick or we would have had lots of ice underneath.



Saturday morning I got up and when it was decided that Steve, Taylor, and Navin would be coming to visit, I vacuumed, straightened things up, did the dishes, emptied the freezer, and threw out items from between 2000 and 2005. When they got here, we went to the store and got ingredients. Navin was the Chef, Steve the Sous Chef, Taylor the Saucier, and I was the Garde Manger. Thank you, Ratatouille.

After dinner we made a fire in the wood-burning stove, and had white mocha hot chocolate and watched a movie. It was awesome.



Sunday around 1:30 I started in on the porch. I threw out crap, I put things in the garage, I swept, vacuumed, beat the rugs, and filled the wood bin. I was ensuring that we would actually USE the stove this winter. I then cleaned up a little more from last night, and cleaned the basement floor as well, which had kitty litter all over it.

Its funny because Jack is always in such a rush to be the first to use the litter box after its been cleaned. The look of contentment that crossed his face while he was squatting there was just hilarious.

To wind down and relax a little, I took some online quizzes. I took the "what drug is your personality like?" quiz, the "what city do you belong in?" quiz, and the "what carnival ride are you?" quiz. I have discovered that I am Heroin, I belong in Rome, and I am a carousel.

You're capable of the highest highs and the lowest lows. Addicted to feeling good, you'll do almost anything to avoid pain. People seek you out, even though you can be quite moody. They're hooked on you! At your best: You are euphoric, stress free, and a little sleepy. What people like about being around you: They're not exactly sure, but they can't get enough about you. What people dislike about being around you: When you finally leave, they go some pretty serious withdrawl. How addicted people get to you: Very... you're quite dangerous.

You're a big city soul with a small town heart which is why you're attracted to the romance of Rome. Strolling down picture perfect streets, cappuccino in hand, and gorgeous Italian people - could life get any better?

You are young at heart and a truly playful person. No one would ever accuse you of taking life too seriously. You are definitely in things for the fun. You find joy easily, and you are often building up anticipation for your next adventure. In relationships, you tend to want to be babied and taken care of. And while you may be a bit high maintenance, you are incredibly loyal. Your life is simple and satisfying. Each day you treat yourself to something you enjoy. You have a lot of emotional attachments, and experiences are extra vivid to you. You tend to be nostalgic and sentimental. The past is important to you. Comfortable around all living things, you have a special connection to animals and children. At your best, you are whimsical, free spirited, and creative. Even if your schemes seem a bit strange, they usually work out wonderfully. At your worst, you are spoiled, demanding, and impossible to satisfy. You've been known to act like a brat if you aren't getting your way!

I suppose now I should go feed myself and the cats.

Oh yeah, and I put the guinea pig on a diet. Its not a starvation diet, but I'm sure SHE thinks it is. Yay for accomplishments. Now if only I had the energy to clean my room...

things from the past

A few months ago I had the opportunity to try Rice Dream, a lactose-free ice cream based on rice milk. Mom used to buy it off a big co-op truck when I was little and I loved it. Its much better than tofutti ice cream. By far. By miles. By LIGHT YEARS. But that just means that tofutti is REALLY bad. It doesn't necessarily mean Rice Dream is good. Since I couldn't remember, I bought some when I found it in a health food store.

As it turns out, things are usually better in your memories. Don't get me wrong, Rice Dream is pretty good. But its not like it was when I was little.

Today, I cleaned out the freezer. I found stuff in the back that expired seven years ago. It was not bought seven years ago. It EXPIRED seven years ago. I discovered that peas lose all their water molecules when they are frozen for seven years, which means you can't really thaw them out because they don't change state anymore.

I also found an energy bar called Ginseng Sunrise. This is another item off my mom's co-op truck, which hasn't come since at least 1996. This was also one of my favorite treats from back then. I don't know what's wrong with me, but I decided to try it to see what it tasted like. Lo and behold, this bar is just as good in my memories as it is now, eleven years later. I don't know if it just doesn't age, or if in my memories the bars always tasted like they were eleven years old, or what, but this thing is delicious.

I'm going to have to buy myself some more of them. Maybe they will be even better, maybe phenomenal, when they are fresh.

Wheeee!

Life is complicated

There's really nothing much to write. After the daylight savings change, I want to just curl up and hibernate until the spring comes again. November isn't a good month for me.

I'm having memories of a time in my past when the summer wind tugged at my hair and cupid wasn't a bad guy. My life was figured out and money wasn't a thought in my mind. The wind was God's breath and the sunset was a masterpiece for me. Then it all went away and later, I found myself back in that awesome place, except without the poetic sunset imagery. Now its November again.

Memories of November include trying to skip it altogether, every year for as far back as I can remember, and only gathering more reasons to try harder to make it disappear. I think I write this post every year just to get it off my chest.

more random musings

I did a lot of driving today. Driving for a long time usually gives me a time to let my mind go rambling. Even when I stopped in various places to get my errands run, my mind was still doing its own thing. It was there, its not like those days when my mind completely takes a vacation. But it was just doing its own thing.

1. The Rutgers Kodenkan Jujitsu Club has been hit in the past year or two with several abdominal operations, two of them emergency appendectomies. Today my mind ramblings were abruptly cut short by a sharp pain in my side. I looked around to see where the guy with the knife was going because I was sure I'd just been stabbed. There was another sharp pain and I thought about a friend of mine, who told me his appendicitis felt like there were glass shards moving through his intestines. I took a deep breath and told myself appendicitis is NOT contagious, and there will not be a third jujitsu appendectomy. The cashier at Shoprite then told me that the basket goes under the conveyor belt, not hanging from my arm. I think she thought I was crazy or something cause I was staring off into space giving myself a little pep talk. But its good. I'm glad I can talk myself out of life-threatening situations.

2. Did you ever find yourself in a situation that was so bad you knew you had to pray but you weren't even sure what to pray for because you don't know what is in the best interests of all involved? Its a sickening feeling.

3. Food for thought. Completely random, this is where my mind takes me sometimes. In the Bible, everyone knows the story of Daniel, civil disobedience regarding religious practice and the subsequent discount stay in Lion's Den Motel. But not many people know that before that, when Daniel was first brought as a captive to the palace, they wanted him to eat like one of them, pork and unclean meats and all that. Daniel decided he wanted to continue to eat like a Hebrew and said so. He told them they should experiment- put him on a vegetable and water diet and watch him for a few days and watch the rest of the young men who were eating the meat and wine. At the end of the period of time, if he was not healthier than the other young men, then he would submit and eat like them. At the end of the trial period, they were all amazed at the difference, and Daniel continued to eat his vegetables. Nowadays, if a person is fasting eating only vegetables and no meats, breads, starches, etc, they call it a Daniel Fast. And this story isn't really going anywhere, other than to say that I'd be interested in trying some sort of fast sometime... but I have to have a regular eating schedule to start with otherwise I'll probably end up passing out or something.

4. Complete change of topic that may be uncomfortable for some of my more modest readers. I was thinking about Scrubs and how Elliot has this sexual fantasy of a Mexican apple thief coming into the ciderhouse to steal apples and falling in love with her. I was wondering if people really have odd sexual fantasies like that, or is it more of a generalized fantasy, like the rape fantasy that I've heard some people mention. I was thinking about it and by putting two and two together, I came to the conclusion that a person I know that I haven't spoken to in a long time might have had a kidnapping sexual fantasy, just based on some things this person said to me. It is somewhat disturbing but also fascinating that one thing might be a complete turn-off while at the same time it is quite exciting to another person. What causes different preferences in people, even expanding the question to non-sexual situations, why do our personalities make us choose different things?

Yeah so those were the burning topics in my mind today, other than the "Gotta wake up, gotta run errands, take my brother to school, find lunch, go to Morristown for jujitsu, go see if I can meet up with Navin, if not, gotta go to sleep cause Tuesday is going to be busy too" thoughts.

K thats all. What do y'all think of the new layout? Not my personality? Maybe dragons are MY sexual fantasy, hahaha.

wood spiders

This is my first attempt at uploading a video. Let's see how it goes.

I have no idea who owns the copyright to this, it came to me in email form, so I assume it is in the public domain. It ends with something about the National Film Board of Canada. This is my C.Y.A. disclaimer. Don't sue me or delete my blog for posting something that everyone is getting in their inbox anyway. Thank you.

Intelligence

I happened to come across a Q&A session with Barack Obama on Youtube. The question was about how Obama feels Stephen Colbert's candidacy will affect his campaign. Below, viewers were able to comment on the video. Here's my favorite. It is indicative of the need for young people to have a high school and/or college level course on American Government.

"And plus, Colbert said he was running for prez of South Carolina. lol Not the whole United Sates... Just South Carolina!"

Yup. Everyone, head to the polls, we need to make sure we vote because we all want Stephen Colbert to be the President of South Carolina.

oops

I forgot to mention the coolest Halloween costume ever. It was a group costume, a whole bunch of them dressed up like Christmas carolers and went to every door performing Christmas songs for Halloween candy. It was the first costume I have ever seen that required Trick-or-treaters to actually DO a trick.

I know them... kinda... so I'm wondering if they will let me come caroling with them in a few weeks.

Halloween

Soo... on October 30, Taylor, Navin, Anissa, and I decided to hang out in costume on Halloween at Anissa's house. Nothing like last minute costume ideas. I haven't dressed up as anything (excluding theater performances) in 10 years. My elementary school was run by the Baptist equivalent of a Catholic nun so Halloween was discouraged. To make up for it, we were allowed to dress as either a Pilgrim or an Indian at the school Thanksgiving banquet. So literally, it has been 9 years and 11 months since I last appeared in public in costume. A Judo gi doesn't count.

Luckily... many of my articles of clothing are eccentric, so when you take a lot of eccentric items and put them together you can usually cross the border into costume-land.



Deek is my pet dragon. He's giving my cheek lovies in this picture haha.




Deek and Me, inspecting the flowers.


After mom gave my camera back and let me leave the house, I got to Anissa's and we all had to help her with her costume. Taylor's sister did Anissa's eyes.




Of course, just because she's wearing a mask doesn't mean she's not Indian underneath. You MUST cook for your guests if you are Indian.


Navin and Taylor were Clark Kent and Lois Lane, which was cute.


After midnight, we all decided to leave Anissa in peace. I wished on a shooting star because Anissa told me it was All Saint's Day and whoever the saints are will hear it. It came true almost immediately so I guess my wish was too simple.

And that's all. Happy All Saint's Day, everyone!